I’m a bad influence.
So that brings things back to that BMW 335i. My buddy went back, drove the car again, and decided that he had to have it. I wasn’t overly impressed with the car, but that was only my view from the right seat on a test drive. Yesterday, though, I got the chance to drive it.
I didn’t realize what this car was. I didn’t realize that this 335i was the last of BMW’s twin-turbo, straight sixes. I didn’t realize that this car basically had the exact same straight-line performance as the mighty E46-era M3. And you wouldn’t realize it, either, because when normal people are told “sure, you can drive my new car,†they tend to not push the car. The 335i is a car you would never think is a brute if you drive it normally. The throttle is so well mannered, and the car is so solid, that it feels like a luxury sedan. Which it is. And if you play nice with the car, and don’t rev it to 4,000 RPM, it could be driven for its entire life as a gentle car for retired executives.
But I’m an idiot, and even though my friend had only owned the car for all of four hours, I wanted to see how the 335i would react to a little prodding.
“HOLY SHIT!â€
-Me, last night
It is two cars in one. It is absolutely a luxury cruiser. It is also the fastest, scariest car I’ve ever driven. Legitimately, clench-your-buttocks fast. A few car reviewers got this car from 0-60 mph in under 5 seconds. But launching from a dead stop is not where this car is frightening. No, this thing becomes a monster when you’re casually driving in fourth gear on a back road. All it takes is a flick of the wrist; you push the gear lever into third, rev match, release the clutch, and all of a sudden Dr. Jekyll becomes Mr. Hyde.
Between 2,000 and 3,000 RPM, the 335i is all of the acceleration you’ll likely ever need. Between 3,000 and 4,000 RPM? It’s quick and fun. But once you move past 4 grand, it’s an M3. It’s scary. Posted speed limits become relative in short order. The damn thing shoves you into its seats (the Germans are funny, by the way; the posted 300 hp/300 torque is demure – this easily has more than that) and dares you to keep your foot down.
I couldn’t. I ran out of straight road. Even though there was a good 1.5 miles of it, somehow that stretch of asphalt disappeared.
Honestly? This car is a pretty good argument for limiting performance. You simply cannot drive this car safely at anything close to its potential on a public road. It’s too much car. You will be a danger to yourself and to others.
But if you count yourself a petrolsexual, find one for a test drive. You can find a used 335i for well under $13 grand now. The BMW inline six mated to two turbos is worth experiencing; a true high point for the combustion engine.
But you probably shouldn’t own one. I only glimpsed its potential last night, and that glimpse already puts you in danger of…well, let’s just say a hefty fine, at the very least.
I had been taking a friend on the (many) test drives I’ve had these past few months, because it’s always nice to have an objective voice tell you “no, this car is crap.†But driving in so many cars with a manual transmission meant he started to get the bug, too.
Last weekend, I went with him to test drive a pair of used cars, a Civic SI and a BMW 335i. Both had over 100K miles on them. Of the two, I only got a chance to drive the Civic, and this was the only SI that I’ve gotten to drive that wasn’t completely hooned to oblivion. It’s also the only car I’ve ever driven that has such a crazy redline, but is actually comfortable near it. Yes, you can pound the thing like a hooligan and have fun revving it up and down the gears, but you can toss it in third on a back road and almost never have to shift. And the car is comfy at 5,000 RPM, not obnoxious. Surprisingly civilized car. It feels very digital, though. The gear change was a touch vague, the accelerator had very little travel, the gauge cluster even feels videogame-y. A different sort of speed, that is. Sadly, the brakes were garbage.
I’ll get back to the BMW.
Road along for two more on Monday – a new Golf GTI and a used BMW 3-series with the “X†drivetrain (4WD). That BMW was nice, but felt a bit ponderous and heavy (it also had the “M†package for the steering wheel and gear change, which was silly and writing performance checks that car couldn’t cash). The new GTI has almost been ruined. Its ride is way harsher than the last few generations. They pipe in fake engine noise that’s basically shouting at you if you accelerate even a little. Fantastic and dart-y handling, but the whole package is simply too harsh. The GTI is supposed to be the genteel hot hatch, for people who don’t want their fun car to be too shout-y. This new one is trying too hard to be a sports car.
Last weekend, I went with him to test drive a pair of used cars, a Civic SI and a BMW 335i. Both had over 100K miles on them. Of the two, I only got a chance to drive the Civic, and this was the only SI that I’ve gotten to drive that wasn’t completely hooned to oblivion. It’s also the only car I’ve ever driven that has such a crazy redline, but is actually comfortable near it. Yes, you can pound the thing like a hooligan and have fun revving it up and down the gears, but you can toss it in third on a back road and almost never have to shift. And the car is comfy at 5,000 RPM, not obnoxious. Surprisingly civilized car. It feels very digital, though. The gear change was a touch vague, the accelerator had very little travel, the gauge cluster even feels videogame-y. A different sort of speed, that is. Sadly, the brakes were garbage.
I’ll get back to the BMW.
Road along for two more on Monday – a new Golf GTI and a used BMW 3-series with the “X†drivetrain (4WD). That BMW was nice, but felt a bit ponderous and heavy (it also had the “M†package for the steering wheel and gear change, which was silly and writing performance checks that car couldn’t cash). The new GTI has almost been ruined. Its ride is way harsher than the last few generations. They pipe in fake engine noise that’s basically shouting at you if you accelerate even a little. Fantastic and dart-y handling, but the whole package is simply too harsh. The GTI is supposed to be the genteel hot hatch, for people who don’t want their fun car to be too shout-y. This new one is trying too hard to be a sports car.
So that brings things back to that BMW 335i. My buddy went back, drove the car again, and decided that he had to have it. I wasn’t overly impressed with the car, but that was only my view from the right seat on a test drive. Yesterday, though, I got the chance to drive it.
I didn’t realize what this car was. I didn’t realize that this 335i was the last of BMW’s twin-turbo, straight sixes. I didn’t realize that this car basically had the exact same straight-line performance as the mighty E46-era M3. And you wouldn’t realize it, either, because when normal people are told “sure, you can drive my new car,†they tend to not push the car. The 335i is a car you would never think is a brute if you drive it normally. The throttle is so well mannered, and the car is so solid, that it feels like a luxury sedan. Which it is. And if you play nice with the car, and don’t rev it to 4,000 RPM, it could be driven for its entire life as a gentle car for retired executives.
But I’m an idiot, and even though my friend had only owned the car for all of four hours, I wanted to see how the 335i would react to a little prodding.
“HOLY SHIT!â€
-Me, last night
It is two cars in one. It is absolutely a luxury cruiser. It is also the fastest, scariest car I’ve ever driven. Legitimately, clench-your-buttocks fast. A few car reviewers got this car from 0-60 mph in under 5 seconds. But launching from a dead stop is not where this car is frightening. No, this thing becomes a monster when you’re casually driving in fourth gear on a back road. All it takes is a flick of the wrist; you push the gear lever into third, rev match, release the clutch, and all of a sudden Dr. Jekyll becomes Mr. Hyde.
Between 2,000 and 3,000 RPM, the 335i is all of the acceleration you’ll likely ever need. Between 3,000 and 4,000 RPM? It’s quick and fun. But once you move past 4 grand, it’s an M3. It’s scary. Posted speed limits become relative in short order. The damn thing shoves you into its seats (the Germans are funny, by the way; the posted 300 hp/300 torque is demure – this easily has more than that) and dares you to keep your foot down.
I couldn’t. I ran out of straight road. Even though there was a good 1.5 miles of it, somehow that stretch of asphalt disappeared.
Honestly? This car is a pretty good argument for limiting performance. You simply cannot drive this car safely at anything close to its potential on a public road. It’s too much car. You will be a danger to yourself and to others.
But if you count yourself a petrolsexual, find one for a test drive. You can find a used 335i for well under $13 grand now. The BMW inline six mated to two turbos is worth experiencing; a true high point for the combustion engine.
But you probably shouldn’t own one. I only glimpsed its potential last night, and that glimpse already puts you in danger of…well, let’s just say a hefty fine, at the very least.
