Well.
This happened.
View attachment 3322
I put high-octane garbage into my body so that you don't have to. Because I'm the type of person who sees a shell made of fried chicken and thinks:
Humanity's Greatest Inventions
3) Pyramids
2) Internet
1) Chalupa made of goddam chicken
For those of you who actually respect your bodies and have no idea that this thing even exists, lemme tell you that inside that chicken is iceberg lettuce (no taste, only texture), some form of something that might have once been cheese (no taste, only texture), and some sort of spicy guac-mayo. It's put on a tiny cardboard tray, because that's the only way to hold the shape. Take it out, and the thing falls apart like a marriage based on a lack of options.
It looks horrendous. Like a two-day old piece of batter-dipped Long John Silver "fish" that got burned in a house fire.
So, of course, I couldn't wait to try it.
And...it's...OK. I'm not gonna say "good," but on the scale of disgusting fast food, this is actually not bad. It's less a chalupa minus masa dough and more of a chicken sandwich without a bun.
Because it's Taco Bell, my stomach felt God's wrath reigning down upon me before God's wrath rained out of me in explosive fashion, but I kinda want another one.